Today, I realized that I did not come with a full toolbox when it comes to solving problems and generally dealing with my kids. Not only did I not bring to parenthood the tools that I needed, but I also didn't get an instruction manual, either. I didn't get a caution or warning label and I certainly did not get a promise that satisfaction would be guaranteed. Today, I am unsatisfied with my parenting and my kids. To tell you the truth, some days I wonder why my children were sent to me to be their mother. I just don't have the tools I tell you. When I asked Todd this question today, he said that, " they were sent to me so that I could learn." To which I promptly replied, "Yea, like what?" Didn't think about that one before it flew out of my mouth. What more could I possibly NEED to LEARN? Um, like how to accumulate some more tools for that toolbox? Where can I go to find the answers I'm looking for to solve the issues I'm having with my kids? My Mom's answer to that question would be simply to pray and read the scriptures. Can it be that easy? Will the answers come? O ye of little faith?
I'm just feeling a little overwhelmed, O.K., maybe today a lot overwhelmed with the responsibilities of parenthood and how to deal with all of the challenges my kids are bringing to the table as of late. I need some more tools in my toolbox, like how to nail Cole's butt down to the chair so that he can get his homework done and put the screws to him about how important grades are and that his performance in school will be in direct correlation to the kind of adult he becomes. Does he care? Nope. Or all the times I try to hammer into Ethan's head the importance of being kind to his friends and cousins, including everyone and sharing and not saying mean things when he doesn't get his way. And that yes, reading is important, everyday to become a good reader. Maybe I'm not motivating them the right ways...Maybe I'm not....Maybe I need to.... Maybe, just maybe, I need to turn this over to the Lord. He'll know. He'll send me the tools I need, right?
