I've decided to add a recipe of the week to my blog. Last night I made homemade Lentil Soup and these delectable breadsticks. They are quick and easy and just the best. They would be great with your family's favorite soup or pasta dish-like spaghetti. YUM! I had some leftover Alfredo sauce and the breadsticks from last night were pretty darn good dipped in that today, for a snack-or lunch;) Give them a try. You won't be disappointed.
Just the Best Breadsticks
1 1/2 c. warm water
1 TBL. instant yeast ( I used the quick kind)
2 TBL. sugar
3 1/2 c. flour
1/2 tsp. salt
Mix all ingred. together in a lg. bowl or electric mixer with dough hook. (I used my Kitchen Aid stand mixer.) Let knead for three minutes. Turn off machine and let the dough rest for ten minutes. Heat oven to 375 degrees. Line a cookie sheet with parchment paper and spray with non-stick spray. Flour your working surface. With a rolling pin, roll out dough to 1/4 to 1/2-inch thick. Using a pizza cutter, cut 1 inch strips. Twist each strip and place on baking sheet about 1/4 inch apart. Sprinkle with garlic powder and grated parmesan cheese. (Or, use whatever herbs your family likes: Italian seasoning, rosemary, thyme, poppy seed, sesame seed, Mrs. Dash.) Cover with a towel or plastic wrap sprayed with non-stick spray. Set in a warm place and let rise for 30 min. Bake 15-20 min. until golden brown. Remove from oven. While hot, using a basting brush, coat each breadstick with melted butter. Sprinkle more parmesan if desired. Enjoy!
Tuesday, October 27, 2009
Monday, October 19, 2009
Sweet is the Work
Last week Todd and I had the great pleasure of taking Cole to the Draper Temple. It was our first time. With Cole. Just our little family. I wished Ethan could've been there too. We weren't complete, it was bitter sweet. But, it's the sweet part I wanted to blog about. What a cool experience!
Let's back up. Over two years ago, I started working on some family genealogy on Todd's side of the family. His dad is a non-member and his mom a convert to the church-Todd too, he was eight or nine when he joined the church. So, needless to say, there is a lot of work that needs to be done. Lots of family that still need to be found and that are waiting for their work to be completed. I love, love doing family history work! I couldn't find enough hours in my day. I didn't want to stop or put it down. I delved in and got a good start. But then, I had the distinct impression that this was just not my season to do this work. I ended up putting it aside, reluctantly.
Fast forward. My mom, who is serving a part time mission at the Family History Library for the church, called me up one morning. She had a name come to her in the middle of the night. She wasn't familiar with who it was. It ended up being Todd's great grandfather, Frank Kiss, the line I had been previously working on two years earlier. She felt pretty strongly that he was waiting. My mom, who has so much more free time than I do took it upon herself to start researching. Through her research, we were able to get a good start on 10 family names that included Todd's great and great, great grandparents on his grandmother's side.
It was these 10 names that we took to the temple. My mom came along to watch. I did baptisms for four female names. It was really cool because Todd was the one that actually got to baptize both Cole and I for his family. His family! Todd was baptised for his great, great grandfather, Daniel Szekretar, who Todd's dad was named after. How cool is that? I've never done temple work for a relative(s) before. It was such an amazing experience, not to mention that it was Cole's very first time doing baptisms! I don't have the words in my vocab to describe what I was feeling. I was definitely on a spiritual high. We all can't wait to do more family names.
Off the subject, a pretty cool thing happened while at the temple. I ran smack into Christian Nielson-you know Nienie's husband. I am an avid follower of her blog. Earlier that same day they were on Oprah, although I had not watched Oprah yet. I made Todd go talk to him in the men's dressing room at the temple. I wanted "Mr. Nielson" to know just how incredible I think he and Nienie are. They inspire me, daily. She, especially. That's a whole other post.
Anyway, I'm so very glad that I have three temples within 15 min. of my home. I am incredibly blessed to live in this time and in this place. I hope to be able to meet the family members that I did work for when I get to the other side. I anxiously, sweetly, look forward to that.
Let's back up. Over two years ago, I started working on some family genealogy on Todd's side of the family. His dad is a non-member and his mom a convert to the church-Todd too, he was eight or nine when he joined the church. So, needless to say, there is a lot of work that needs to be done. Lots of family that still need to be found and that are waiting for their work to be completed. I love, love doing family history work! I couldn't find enough hours in my day. I didn't want to stop or put it down. I delved in and got a good start. But then, I had the distinct impression that this was just not my season to do this work. I ended up putting it aside, reluctantly.
Fast forward. My mom, who is serving a part time mission at the Family History Library for the church, called me up one morning. She had a name come to her in the middle of the night. She wasn't familiar with who it was. It ended up being Todd's great grandfather, Frank Kiss, the line I had been previously working on two years earlier. She felt pretty strongly that he was waiting. My mom, who has so much more free time than I do took it upon herself to start researching. Through her research, we were able to get a good start on 10 family names that included Todd's great and great, great grandparents on his grandmother's side.
It was these 10 names that we took to the temple. My mom came along to watch. I did baptisms for four female names. It was really cool because Todd was the one that actually got to baptize both Cole and I for his family. His family! Todd was baptised for his great, great grandfather, Daniel Szekretar, who Todd's dad was named after. How cool is that? I've never done temple work for a relative(s) before. It was such an amazing experience, not to mention that it was Cole's very first time doing baptisms! I don't have the words in my vocab to describe what I was feeling. I was definitely on a spiritual high. We all can't wait to do more family names.
Off the subject, a pretty cool thing happened while at the temple. I ran smack into Christian Nielson-you know Nienie's husband. I am an avid follower of her blog. Earlier that same day they were on Oprah, although I had not watched Oprah yet. I made Todd go talk to him in the men's dressing room at the temple. I wanted "Mr. Nielson" to know just how incredible I think he and Nienie are. They inspire me, daily. She, especially. That's a whole other post.
Anyway, I'm so very glad that I have three temples within 15 min. of my home. I am incredibly blessed to live in this time and in this place. I hope to be able to meet the family members that I did work for when I get to the other side. I anxiously, sweetly, look forward to that.
Wednesday, October 7, 2009
Need Advice, Got Ideas?
I woke up in the middle of the night with one sentence on my mind, "Ask Debbie if she has any filters on her computer." Weird. Debbie is my new next door neighbor. Her son Ryan (13) and Cole (12) are great friends. If they're not here on the computer, they're over there. I mean they do other things when they hang out, but one of their favorites is gaming on the computer. So, at 2:30 a.m., my mind is trying to figure out why I woke up out of a deep sleep with that going on in my brain. Is it a warning? An omen? A wake-up call so to speak? A still small voice? Should I be concerned? Should I ask Debbie? What will she think? Or am I just nuts?
I don't worry about the computer at our house-we do have a great filter. I can always walk past my office and see what's on the screen. We've talked a few times to Cole about the dangers of porn. I don't have any reason not to trust him. And, I can certainly be in control of him not being exposed to, or having the chance to view porn at home. But, away from home? That's a different story. To be honest, I've never really given the situation much thought. (Dang it, he is at the age where I have to start thinking and worrying about this kinda stuff.)
So my questions is, how do I protect my child from the evils of porn (accidental or otherwise) when he's away from home?
Any thoughts?
I don't worry about the computer at our house-we do have a great filter. I can always walk past my office and see what's on the screen. We've talked a few times to Cole about the dangers of porn. I don't have any reason not to trust him. And, I can certainly be in control of him not being exposed to, or having the chance to view porn at home. But, away from home? That's a different story. To be honest, I've never really given the situation much thought. (Dang it, he is at the age where I have to start thinking and worrying about this kinda stuff.)
So my questions is, how do I protect my child from the evils of porn (accidental or otherwise) when he's away from home?
Any thoughts?
Thursday, September 17, 2009
Constant Struggle
Disclaimer: This post is deeply personal and kindof a downer. Pop a Prozac before going further!
I think I'm suffering from post-move depression. Maybe it's just the plain old kind? I have always struggled with depression, probably since I was 21 years old. I went through some really traumatic things that year, which I'm sure brought my predisposition to depression out. Since then its been a roller coaster ride. I have had it on and off since then. I know I had post-partum with my first pregnancy. Not so much with my second. But this past year, my depression has become more challenging. Last August, 2008, I thought I would take a break from my depression medication. I told myself I wasn't depressed anymore (I was feeling good) so why did I need to keep taking it? "I don't need that anymore. I'm fine." Bad idea. During the course of that month things progressively went downhill. I knew I needed to get back on my meds. It's pretty common from what I know, for people that are depressed to talk themselves out of needing to take medication. I don't know why. It's not rational thinking. So, I started taking them again. Because I definitely didn't like the way I was feeling off of them.
When I am depressed, I feel like I have a heavy, wet blanket weighing me down. I have no energy. No pep in my step. I feel tired and run down all the time. I'm cranky. I don't want to go anywhere or do anything. Nothing sounds fun. I really don't want to talk on the phone to my family and friends. Todd and the kids just sometimes bug. I just want to be left alone, No demands. So I don't have to fake feeling normal. That takes an enormous amount of energy. Energy, I just don't have some days. (Don't worry, my depression has never come with any thoughts of suicide-I'm not severe, just a little moderate, right now.) It's easier for me to just get thorough it alone, with no pressure or expectations. I know when I'm like this I can only disappoint those around me.
I do have to say, that I'm very grateful for my husband. He is supportive and loving. He listens and reassures. He validates. He tells me It's o.k.-to be right where I am, o.k. to feel the way I feel at a particular time. He is patient with me (and it takes alot of patience) and gives me space when I need it. He picks up the slack for me on my suckiest days. Most of all he loves me despite my depressive episodes and ugly imperfections. I don't know how or why. But I am eternally grateful to him.
My mom called a few weeks ago. I really didn't feel like talking-she calls me all the time. Sometimes daily. It's just too much. She proceeded to ask me if everything was O.K. I debated the answer in my head. I decided to just be honest with her. "No, Mom, I'm not alright." (Like she didn't already know that.) Her response, " Well, what's going on in your life?" Like something has to be terribly wrong to make me feel the way I do. Or like, for hell sake Cami, what do you possibly have to be depressed about...you just moved into a beautiful home, your kids are blissfully happy, they're both in school full time, you have all of this free time to do whatever you want...blah blah blah. I know, it sounds like I should be the picture of happiness. I'm just not. She doesn't get it. Or me. Or depression. Depression isn't a situational disease. It's a chemical imbalance in the brain. Not enough neurotransmitters connecting with the right amount of chemicals in the right way. Next, "Are you taking your medication?" Followed by, "Well do you think it's the right dose?" REALLY?!!? My depression shouldn't be new to her. I've suffered with it on and off for the last 20 years. Unfortunately, for me, she just doesn't get it. I was annoyed with her and came away not feeling the least bit validated. Why did I answer the phone??
Every day is different. I have good days, o.k. days, sucky days. Sometimes it's easy for me to get down on myself and sit on the pity pot asking, WHY? Why me? Why does this have to be my challenge in life. I just want to be normal. I don't want this struggle. (I'm not sure what I'd want in its place, but I know this is not the way life is meant to be lived.) I like to imagine what my life, my relationship with my husband, kids, friends, self would be like if I wasn't depressed. I like to think of all I could accomplish, things that other people take for granted, like my mom. Just getting through a normal day feeling...well...normal, even downright happy. I look forward to feeling that again on a more consistent basis.
I know I'm taking a risk sharing all of this. I don't care. It's part of me. The very ugly part. The part that takes up too much of my energy. I just need to let it go. Talk about it. Admit that I have a constant struggle in my life. That, unfortunately, is normal. We all have things that are ugly and things that challenge us. The test I guess, is how we deal with and become victorious over our struggles and challenges. It's about the journey. The good, the bad and the ugly.
I think I'm suffering from post-move depression. Maybe it's just the plain old kind? I have always struggled with depression, probably since I was 21 years old. I went through some really traumatic things that year, which I'm sure brought my predisposition to depression out. Since then its been a roller coaster ride. I have had it on and off since then. I know I had post-partum with my first pregnancy. Not so much with my second. But this past year, my depression has become more challenging. Last August, 2008, I thought I would take a break from my depression medication. I told myself I wasn't depressed anymore (I was feeling good) so why did I need to keep taking it? "I don't need that anymore. I'm fine." Bad idea. During the course of that month things progressively went downhill. I knew I needed to get back on my meds. It's pretty common from what I know, for people that are depressed to talk themselves out of needing to take medication. I don't know why. It's not rational thinking. So, I started taking them again. Because I definitely didn't like the way I was feeling off of them.
When I am depressed, I feel like I have a heavy, wet blanket weighing me down. I have no energy. No pep in my step. I feel tired and run down all the time. I'm cranky. I don't want to go anywhere or do anything. Nothing sounds fun. I really don't want to talk on the phone to my family and friends. Todd and the kids just sometimes bug. I just want to be left alone, No demands. So I don't have to fake feeling normal. That takes an enormous amount of energy. Energy, I just don't have some days. (Don't worry, my depression has never come with any thoughts of suicide-I'm not severe, just a little moderate, right now.) It's easier for me to just get thorough it alone, with no pressure or expectations. I know when I'm like this I can only disappoint those around me.
I do have to say, that I'm very grateful for my husband. He is supportive and loving. He listens and reassures. He validates. He tells me It's o.k.-to be right where I am, o.k. to feel the way I feel at a particular time. He is patient with me (and it takes alot of patience) and gives me space when I need it. He picks up the slack for me on my suckiest days. Most of all he loves me despite my depressive episodes and ugly imperfections. I don't know how or why. But I am eternally grateful to him.
My mom called a few weeks ago. I really didn't feel like talking-she calls me all the time. Sometimes daily. It's just too much. She proceeded to ask me if everything was O.K. I debated the answer in my head. I decided to just be honest with her. "No, Mom, I'm not alright." (Like she didn't already know that.) Her response, " Well, what's going on in your life?" Like something has to be terribly wrong to make me feel the way I do. Or like, for hell sake Cami, what do you possibly have to be depressed about...you just moved into a beautiful home, your kids are blissfully happy, they're both in school full time, you have all of this free time to do whatever you want...blah blah blah. I know, it sounds like I should be the picture of happiness. I'm just not. She doesn't get it. Or me. Or depression. Depression isn't a situational disease. It's a chemical imbalance in the brain. Not enough neurotransmitters connecting with the right amount of chemicals in the right way. Next, "Are you taking your medication?" Followed by, "Well do you think it's the right dose?" REALLY?!!? My depression shouldn't be new to her. I've suffered with it on and off for the last 20 years. Unfortunately, for me, she just doesn't get it. I was annoyed with her and came away not feeling the least bit validated. Why did I answer the phone??
Every day is different. I have good days, o.k. days, sucky days. Sometimes it's easy for me to get down on myself and sit on the pity pot asking, WHY? Why me? Why does this have to be my challenge in life. I just want to be normal. I don't want this struggle. (I'm not sure what I'd want in its place, but I know this is not the way life is meant to be lived.) I like to imagine what my life, my relationship with my husband, kids, friends, self would be like if I wasn't depressed. I like to think of all I could accomplish, things that other people take for granted, like my mom. Just getting through a normal day feeling...well...normal, even downright happy. I look forward to feeling that again on a more consistent basis.
I know I'm taking a risk sharing all of this. I don't care. It's part of me. The very ugly part. The part that takes up too much of my energy. I just need to let it go. Talk about it. Admit that I have a constant struggle in my life. That, unfortunately, is normal. We all have things that are ugly and things that challenge us. The test I guess, is how we deal with and become victorious over our struggles and challenges. It's about the journey. The good, the bad and the ugly.
Wednesday, August 26, 2009
New House...New Baby!
Meet the newest member of our family...OLIVER!
The boys wanted a puppy last summer. We had just decided to put our house up for sale so, getting a new puppy was not in the cards-with potty training and keeping the house immaculate. SO, we promised them last September that as soon as we got into our new house we could get a puppy. We had them earning "puppy bucks" for everytime we asked them to clean their rooms for a house showing. Little did we, or they, know it would take so dang long for us to sell our house. They really "earned" little Oliver.
It is such a joy having a puppy! I am an animal lover-especially dogs. (I even worked a couple of years at an animal hospital before I met Todd. I loved that job.) We've really taken a step up from the hampsters we've had over the years. Oliver is a Shih Tzu. He is 8 weeks old and sooo darn cute! I think he looks a lot like the ewoks in Star Wars. His little face melts my heart. I'm excited to wake up every morning and play with him and smell his puppy breath when he licks me. The boys love him, too. There is nothing like having a new puppy!
Thursday, August 13, 2009
Settling In
Whew !!!!!
We're finally out of the old house and into the new one! We had to be out of our house in West Jordan on Sat. Aug. 1st by 5:00 p.m. We just barely made that deadline-thanks to our very dear friends-the Browns. Seriously, at noon that day, I was in a panic wondering how we were going to get it all done-packing and cleaning. No sooner had I said a little prayer did the phone ring. Todd answered. It was Tera. She told Todd that their whole family was on their way to help us and that they were coming with Slurpees, too! When Todd came into the bathroom where I was cleaning and told me, I nearly cried. I think I was at the end of a very long and emotional rope. I was very humbled and grateful for the help. The Brown's helped to give us the additional energy we needed (both physically and mentally)to get all of the many tasks remaining-finished! A BIG thanks to our wonderful friends! Unbelieveably, the new homeowner showed up, ready to move in a half an hour early! CRAP! Needless to say we were not all the way ready. I hadn't even had the chance to go look through my house one last time and say goodbye. Maybe it was better that way. So many memories-nine years worth. How do you say goodbye for the last time??
I have never felt so totally and completely exhausted-except after having babies. It has been a long time since I have slept so soundly. (Unlike after you've had a new baby;)
From West Jordan, we went with suitcases and boxes packed with our day-to-day necessities, to my brother's house. We stayed with his family for 5 days and then packed it all up again to stay at my dad's for 4 days. Finally, yes, finally, we moved in to our new home in Riverton on Monday, Aug. 10th. YEA!!! Let me just say moving is one heck of alot of work-and stress. My hair is falling out, kinda like it does after you have a baby. In fact, there are alot of similarities between being preggers, giving birth and the adjustment to looking for a house, moving and the adjustment of relocating. Can you say ANXIETY?? But it comes with the thrill of having something new and different.
Our new house has a 3 car garage. The third car garage is double deep-so I guess technically, it is a 4 car garage. You would not believe that the whole side is completely full of all of our years of stuff. Boxes and boxes and boxes of stuff. I made the decision that once I got it all here (from 5 different places) I was going to be really careful about what came into the house. Because, surely, truly, we just don't need all of this "stuff"! And, I never want to move it all again-EVER!
One box at a time, things are finding their new homes. We are adjusting to a new area, neighborhood, friends and a lovely home. (Not to mention new schools for both of the kids-both get to take a bus-I am jumping for JOY I tell you. No more commuting to South Jordan!!)We are glad to finally be at our "destination". I will post pictures sometime soon-when I find the camera and the stuff to download it to the computer. For now, I just wanted to get you up to speed on our move. And to re-assure you all that I survived and that I am alive.
We're finally out of the old house and into the new one! We had to be out of our house in West Jordan on Sat. Aug. 1st by 5:00 p.m. We just barely made that deadline-thanks to our very dear friends-the Browns. Seriously, at noon that day, I was in a panic wondering how we were going to get it all done-packing and cleaning. No sooner had I said a little prayer did the phone ring. Todd answered. It was Tera. She told Todd that their whole family was on their way to help us and that they were coming with Slurpees, too! When Todd came into the bathroom where I was cleaning and told me, I nearly cried. I think I was at the end of a very long and emotional rope. I was very humbled and grateful for the help. The Brown's helped to give us the additional energy we needed (both physically and mentally)to get all of the many tasks remaining-finished! A BIG thanks to our wonderful friends! Unbelieveably, the new homeowner showed up, ready to move in a half an hour early! CRAP! Needless to say we were not all the way ready. I hadn't even had the chance to go look through my house one last time and say goodbye. Maybe it was better that way. So many memories-nine years worth. How do you say goodbye for the last time??
I have never felt so totally and completely exhausted-except after having babies. It has been a long time since I have slept so soundly. (Unlike after you've had a new baby;)
From West Jordan, we went with suitcases and boxes packed with our day-to-day necessities, to my brother's house. We stayed with his family for 5 days and then packed it all up again to stay at my dad's for 4 days. Finally, yes, finally, we moved in to our new home in Riverton on Monday, Aug. 10th. YEA!!! Let me just say moving is one heck of alot of work-and stress. My hair is falling out, kinda like it does after you have a baby. In fact, there are alot of similarities between being preggers, giving birth and the adjustment to looking for a house, moving and the adjustment of relocating. Can you say ANXIETY?? But it comes with the thrill of having something new and different.
Our new house has a 3 car garage. The third car garage is double deep-so I guess technically, it is a 4 car garage. You would not believe that the whole side is completely full of all of our years of stuff. Boxes and boxes and boxes of stuff. I made the decision that once I got it all here (from 5 different places) I was going to be really careful about what came into the house. Because, surely, truly, we just don't need all of this "stuff"! And, I never want to move it all again-EVER!
One box at a time, things are finding their new homes. We are adjusting to a new area, neighborhood, friends and a lovely home. (Not to mention new schools for both of the kids-both get to take a bus-I am jumping for JOY I tell you. No more commuting to South Jordan!!)We are glad to finally be at our "destination". I will post pictures sometime soon-when I find the camera and the stuff to download it to the computer. For now, I just wanted to get you up to speed on our move. And to re-assure you all that I survived and that I am alive.
Wednesday, July 15, 2009
HELLO???
Hi friends and family! What has happened to all of you? Nobody is blogging anymore. Damn that Facebook! :(
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